A plea to the victims, a plea to the ECC Board, prayers for the Darlings

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[DarthVader]

Victims, I have no right to ask you anything.  Know that I have advocated for you internally to the ECC leadership I have relationships with. I have donated to the GoFundMe defense fund.  How you chose to discuss (or not) what happened to you is your choice and I respect it.

I share your distrust of the ECC process – they haven’t handled this well, starting with the initial twitter post they made, & then not apologizing for the misleading tweet directly, the ECC lawyers poor initial reach out to Suzanne which started with a demand that Suzanne stop posting on social media.  I share your unease that the board is anonymous and has been appointed by those it purports to provide oversight of. I wish all these things were different, and I wish ECC would work with you directly on a mutually agreeable process to find the truth.  I still hope they do. 

In the meantime, although I have no right, I would like to ask you to comply with the Evergreen process as it may be the only process they will permit; I don’t ask this lightly and will not blame you in any way if you chose not not to. I can’t guarantee that if all of you engage in the ECC process justice will be done, but I do believe the one victim who has come forward has been heard in a meaningful way, and I believe if others come forward even though the process may be flawed, the chances of justice increase.  If not, it may very well rest entirely on the one victim who has come forward to the ECC investigator. I’m sorry for what happened to you, I am sorry to be asking this of you and I wish you all healing whatever you chose to do. If my asking this offends any of you, I apologize.

ECC board – I believe your intentions are good. I don’t believe there is a conspiracy to hide anything, but ECC has made missteps along the way that have made this process harder, including a misleading tweet that poisoned that atmosphere, a very late and indirect apology for it and a very poor set of initial communications from the Board hired lawyer, even though she is highly qualified.

Unlike the victims, I believe I DO have a right to make a request of you – I have contributed to your ministries financially, I have served and am serving in multiple ministry areas.  What I expect from my church is the highest standard of integrity and most gracious behavior to anyone who has a complaint, even if that behavior is not reciprocated.  Although you certainly can insist that your process is the only process and if victims chose not to engage, that is their loss, I would ask that you not do this. I would ask that you reach out directly to the victims and offer to work with them on mutually agreeable process. I want an innocent verdict for Mark to be unquestionable, with every effort made to encourage all impacted parties to participate.
 
If on March 27, you chose to make a decision based off of one victim’s response, without an effort to gain broader engagement, please know that I and many others will be placing the highest scrutiny on that decision, as it could give the appearance of an effort to bury the truth, protect your leadership and move on. I am not holding you accountable in any way for a specific outcome but you are accountable for your efforts to find the truth and act on it accordingly. My families future at ECC depends on my believe you did everything possible to find the truth.

Darling family – I am so sorry for what you are experiencing. I have not intended to offend you either but I if I did, I apologize. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

[Watching]

Thanks Darth Vader, for this very gracious post and reasonable request(s)!  I am in complete agreement with your request, particularly to ECC as I have been a tithing member of an ECC church for decades - still am - and am still involved in ministry.  The way that ECC has handled this issue has definitely caused me concern about their trustworthiness in this process.  ECC - this is a reasonable request.  Please know that there may be many, many current members, like myself, watching to see how you respond.  Our future as members of ECC may depend on it. 

[DarthVader]

Thanks Watching..This was posted on Suzanne's FB page today as part of a longer post. Hopefully either the Board or victims will change their stance between now and 3/27 so the investigator has all the information from both sides before making any decisions.

"I received an email from Evergreen's Lynn Newman (point person) that our two requests will be given to the Board of Trustees Tuesday, March 27, 2018. I have heard, but acknowledge this could be rumor, that the Board of Trustees will be deciding at that meeting if our allegations are true or false and Mark Darling's fate.  At this time, only one victim has chosen to turn in their Victim Impact Statement to attorney Joan Harris who is representing the Evergreen Board of Trustees. Each victim has decided their own boundaries with this process. There are more victims who are more than willing to speak to an independent investigator who is selected by both the Evergreen Board of Trustees and the victims, with the assurance that the findings are made public"