Manipulative Groups Might...

Welcome to De-Commissioned, a place for former members of the Great Commission movement (aka GCM, GCC, GCAC, GCI, the Blitz) to discuss problems they've experienced in the association's practices and theology.

You may read and post, but some features are restricted to registered members. Please consider registering to gain full access! Registration is free and only takes a few moments to complete.

[AgathaL'Orange]

Here's another checklist of warning signs of an unhealthy discipleship group taken from "The Discipleship Disaster"  by Mary Alice Chrnalogar.

MANIPULATIVE GROUPS MIGHT...

•cause you to feel a distancing from family (ask your family if they feel you have cut them off emotionally because you, yourself, may not be able to see this)
•cause your spontaneous decisions to diminish because you want to check with your discipler first
•cause you to abandon normal old hobbies and friends who are not in the group
•cause you to be stilted in your conversations with family about plans
•diminish the closeness to your family & old friends
•cause you to accept a leader's advice so readily that some perceive you as unduly influenced or controlled
•make you think that you have more accountability then most churches when in reality it is more accountability to reporting to a man
•cause you to have an unhealthy submission and an un-Biblical obedience to human leaders
•subtly teach that following all of what leaders request is seen as spiritual growth even when you don't feel right about it
•create unnecessary shame or guilt when your desires don't match the authority
•cause a person to suppress their real personality type or change it
•cause people to lose their personal initiative
•cause burnout problems, serious depression, and a variety of other psychological and spiritual problems after a period of suppressing their own thoughts and desires to follow what their "mature discipler" thinks is better
•cause you to see yourself as going against God when you have thinking independent from the leaders
•cause you to see leaders as better able to hear from God
•cause you to label yourself as rebellious when you are struggling with accepting their advice
•cause you to see yourself as going against God's will when you don't want to accept their advice as more valid than your own ideas
•cause you to deny that your discipleship group could be practicing the "shepherdship error" when it may very well be doing exactly that
•only indoctrinate the leaders and those being groomed for leadership, into the abusive discipleship errors
•allow part of the congregation great freedom but not those whom they are grooming for leadership
•exist within mainline churches

I thought the last several points were interesting and show why those NOT in leadership or being groomed for leadership may never fully see the dangerous teachings.

[margaret]

I had no idea where to post this, and after much searching, landed here.

I am in a private group on Facebook that deals with spiritual abuse recovery.  I got permission from the person who posted this to put it on here without her name.  It just rang so many bells with me regarding my time with GCx over the years. She uses the term 'mentoring', whereas in our GCx groups 'discipleship' seemed to be the preferred term.

"Mentoring can be a positive thing if done with maturity and wisdom. Unfortunately in too many faith settings it is done as a method of controlling the people and their actions.
Increasingly there seems to be virtually no training or standard that mentors have to have, other than they are mentored by someone else further up the chain.
The advice given, regardless if it is good, bad, or indifferent is expected to be taken. Leaders will back the other leaders decisions made, even if they personally disagree with it for unity within the group.
If your mentors advice is rejected, you end up with a black spot against your name as being unteachable, damaged or rebellious.
Increasingly mentoring seems to be becoming a process used for potential leaders to progress within the organisation, instead of an opportunity for people to help and care for each other.
The situation benefits those upward in the organisation while the consequences are paid for by the masses below.
No amount of time, service or jumping through hoops will change the status quo.
Confidentiality also seems to go out the window and many people seem to have private information that should not be shared. publicly.
Unfortunately we are trained to accept this state of affairs as normal and trust that their intentions are good until we can no longer ignore the difference between what we hope is happening to what is really occurring.
Then they wonder why so many people are leaving.
I am glad to be free of all this now, but what a journey it was."

I'm finally in counseling to begin, hopefully, a healing path post GCx. Best wishes to you all.