Validation

Welcome to De-Commissioned, a place for former members of the Great Commission movement (aka GCM, GCC, GCAC, GCI, the Blitz) to discuss problems they've experienced in the association's practices and theology.

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[AgathaL'Orange]

I am so grateful to be done with this movement. 

The past few days have shown me that. 

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[Differentstrokes]

Honestly I started out hoping that maybe this would opening up a possible reconciliation with the church, but aside from one or two people who seem more kind of rational, all that's been proven is that I am lucky to be out of there. And im happy to have found others who understand the struggle I went through, and I love you all do much ❤❤

[Rebel in a Good Way]

I would *hope* that there are more reasonable people out there other than those who have popped on here.  But Agatha, I agree with you!  My husband and I moved away and I consider us very lucky.

[Peace]

Again, I would beg for people on this forum to not generalize about those of us who have tried extremely hard to have a civil, logical, productive and at times even encouraging dialogue about GCx.

A handful of posters on this forum do not represent the beliefs, sentiments or hearts of GCx as a whole. Just like I don't categorize or project a snarky comment here or sweeping generalization there onto this entire forum.

[Godtrumpsall]

Again, I would beg for people on this forum to not generalize about those of us who have tried extremely hard to have a civil, logical, productive and at times even encouraging dialogue about GCx.

A handful of posters on this forum do not represent the beliefs, sentiments or hearts of GCx as a whole. Just like I don't categorize or project a snarky comment here or sweeping generalization there onto this entire forum.

Thank you for this rational thought.  I admit I have made one angry post that stated some generalization of this forum as a whole.  But I have had restraint in my posts since, trying to stay to facts.  I am sure some might dig through and find some contradictions to this.  I have been trying. 

[Digital Lynch Mob]

OK, me too. I have crossed the line. Forgive me for that.

[Janet Easson Martin]

Forgiven.

[AgathaL'Orange]

Yes, forgiven. 

[margaret]

Peace,

I have really appreciated your participation in the forum. You have been kind, loving, and genuine.

[Peace]

Thank you, margaret.

I have been encouraged, challenged and accepted by many here.

[Free now]

Ditto to what margaret said, Peace. Thanks for your loving voice.

[GodisFaithful]

Has the dust settled? Whew! Poking my head up from inside the saloon to say hi.  Is it safe now? Bullets have stopped flying??

Some may interpret these words by Agatha as unkind or unloving, but I agree, and I think most see her tender heart:
"I am so grateful to be done with this movement.  The past few days have shown me that. Thank you thank you thank you."

While the bullets were flying it gave me and I am sure other GCxers time to think and reflect.

I tend to be very skeptical of motives and smooth words of people still in GC churches.  Trust is not there for me.  Not at all.  I do not see GC churches as independent of each other.  If wrong teaching or treatment of people happens over yonder, shouldn't it be concerning to a member over in another place?

Perhaps some of us have a tender heart about spiritual abuse and bad teaching and heavy handed leadership because we have experienced it and many have researched it and studied some things to figure out our experience.  Spiritual abuse is real and can seriously debilitate a person's faith. If you think spiritual abuse is not real and that we are a bunch of cry babies, maybe there isn't much of a chance for meaningful dialogue. Because what is needed is compassion and mercy.

There are a lot of people on here who have told sad, tragic stories. And often the reaction of outsiders is "ho-hum", "move on", "boo hoo", "what woosies, I have gone through much worse", or maybe even that we are making stuff up.  We on this forum care about people who claim to have been negatively affected by GC churches.  If I personally think someone sounds kind of goofy, I can just switch to another thread or whatever. But I am not judgy.  They  can tell their story, and by telling, they are probably in a better place. 

Some of us have lost all of our most meaningful friends, not out of choice, when leaving a GC church. And, I might add, our kid's friends.  Some of us have had our dating choices messed with in a way that is very confusing and has long lasting consequences. (Not me, but I feel for some college student's stories.) Some of us feel like the standards were so stringent that we would never measure up.  Or worse. 

Sometimes we laugh (one good belly laugh per day is helpful), sometimes we vent about a GC experience, sometimes we debate, sometimes we weep with or pray for a person with a fake name that we have grown to love who we have never met.

There is a glue that holds us together that outsiders might not understand.  I've been gone for over 20 years. Still working through some stuff.  Does it mean I am bitter? Maybe. I may come to that realization. But no GCxer is shoving a Bible verse down my throat and judging me for that, like they have never been bitter, ever ever. (They are so above that horrible sin that only others have!) Time and genuine friends, and for me (not all GCxers) the Lord, help me.

"All of the good things are still all of the good things." (Agatha from another post.) Things like joy and hope.

Thanks Agatha.  You have a way of defusing scary situations.

[AgathaL'Orange]

Awww, thank you.  And as one of my boys used to say years ago instead of you’re welcome (I always thought it came from Harry Potter but who knows?), you’re welks.  😁

[Linda]

Beautifully said, GodisFaithful.

Thank you.

[imnotbroken]

Well said God is faithful! 

I have spent way too much time reading posts on this forum in the past few days since finding it, reliving the past, shedding tears, and finding healing.  Thanks to all of you for your time in posting your stories, continue to do so, they need to be heard. 

Freedom comes from Christ, not a church.  Thankful to be free!

[GodisFaithful]

In my post above I was stating GCx but meaning GC EX (like one who is out.)

Anyway, all seems kind of quiet on the Western Front, so I thought I would sneak in here and say that I really love you guys, like what Differentstrokes was saying, and appreciate the comrade-ship that is provided here. and education, too, with lots of good articles and stuff to ponder.

And I like it that there are some new voices.  I appreciate those who are still in GC who have come here with a respectful attitude, trying to understand and engage without blasting or condemning.  That's classy.

[Free in Christ]

I also wanted to say thank you to those who have helped make information and experiences available. I put off working through my experience for a decade, and it has been so helpful to put words to it. It has not made me more bitter or angry, but it has helped me understand what I went through and why it impacted me the way it did, which is important. I don't have another safe place I could have done this (still close ties), so thank you. Some voices here lately have reminded me vividly, almost like a flash back, of what it was like to be in the bondage of always being judged spiritually and finding your status in what you do or how you measure up. What a burden. I am free of that now. I am not saying that is everyone's experience in GCX, but it was mine.

[pvitartas]

From my experience in the Blitz Movement, apologies were often made from guilt, not sorrow.  I don't doubt the sincerity of the apology, I doubt the motive. I hope things have changed in the Great Commission organizations; I have reason for skepticism.

All too often apologies are made in order to relieve the conscience, not fix the problem. 

Further, after letting loose with both barrels, an apology doesn't make it all better, or make it all go away. 

[margaret]

Agree, pvitartas. Our “pastor’s” final apology was cheap. It was strictly obligatory, since his puppeteer told him to say it. Plus it erased his chalkboard of responsibility. Easy peasy!

[Godisgrace]

I also wanted to say thank you to those who have helped make information and experiences available. I put off working through my experience for a decade, and it has been so helpful to put words to it. It has not made me more bitter or angry, but it has helped me understand what I went through and why it impacted me the way it did, which is important. I don't have another safe place I could have done this (still close ties), so thank you. Some voices here lately have reminded me vividly, almost like a flash back, of what it was like to be in the bondage of always being judged spiritually and finding your status in what you do or how you measure up. What a burden. I am free of that now. I am not saying that is everyone's experience in GCX, but it was mine.

I was the same way. Thankfully it took me 2 years after leaving. I appreciate what Janet and Linda post, I may not post alot but its amazing to see how they are reaching out. This helps to remind me why I left and helps to know that I am never alone. Some may not need this forum, and others do.