Hello, who is out there?

Welcome to De-Commissioned, a place for former members of the Great Commission movement (aka GCM, GCC, GCAC, GCI, the Blitz) to discuss problems they've experienced in the association's practices and theology.

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[greenfieldsofglory]

Hi all! Let's see how this goes. I'm still on my journey in healing from GCM and making sense of it but overall it is in the past for me so I am here to support whoever may need it. I grew up in it from the time I was a baby so I have heard and seen it all.

[Janet Easson Martin]

Greetings, Greenfieldsofglory!!  Like your posting name. May God bless you in a special way for being willing to speak here. There must be hundreds if not thousands in your shoes. There are a few threads here about “growing up” GCx.

Very glad to hear you are healing and learning to make sense of it. When you are ready, sharing on here what has helped you may give others hope and healing.

Obviously a lot more read here than post. Depending on how many pages are newly clicked on each day, there could be maybe 350 or 1000 people viewing pages for the first time each day.  Based on the average person opening 5 new pages a day.) Once someone newly clicks on a page, it is registered as a view. If that same person clicks on the same page another day, it is not counted as “view.” The Most Online Today represents the most people simultaneously online each day. Otherwise, if only 30 were online in a day and there were 3000 Page Views that day, that would mean the average person that day was clicking on 100 New Pages a day. That would be a LOT of reading!

So, there are many more people reading a day than we realize. I would imagine those raised in GCx would be least likely to post, which is understandable with the close dynamics involved. It is hugely helpful most post here anonymously and try not to share any details that would reveal their identity.

Your voice will be heard.

[Janet Easson Martin]

By the way, polls on this site sadly do not work. Not sure what the glitch is.

[greenfieldsofglory]

Thanks! Wow! I didn't realize there was this much activity!

I definitely prefer people don't know who I am because it is a small world especially within the former GCM circle.

[Huldah]

Hello, Greenfieldsofglory, and welcome to the forum. This forum was very helpful to me in my own healing from GCx. I hope the material here is also helpful to you.

[greenfieldsofglory]

Thank you! It is already encouraging knowing this exists ~ reminding me I am not the only "crazy" one who left GCM. I have seen this url on Google for years whenever I randomly internet stalked my old church's website but never seriously considered joining the group until last week. Therapy the last couple of years has really helped me grow as a person generally speaking. Lately I am navigating how much time to spend pushing forward mentally versus how much time to dig into what I experienced during GCM and kind of unpack those memories in order to fully heal from them. What about this forum has helped you the most?

[margaret]

Welcome, gfog--glad you're here.

To answer your question, what helped me the most was exactly what you have expressed: I was not, and am not, crazy for having had all the discomfort with how GCM was run. Also that I was not alone; so many others felt exactly the same way and had quite similar experiences.
To address the question of how you wish to navigate your personal growth now that you've found the forum: I have perused the site in waves. Sometimes I'm on here a whole lot, and other times, I feel like I just don't need it as much. It was important for me to to not set any "shoulds" or "shouldn'ts" on how to navigate my healing. I had had enough shoulds and shouldn'ts with this organization to last me a few lifetimes, and I decided to just trust myself and let my needs dictate my process.
I also hit up a few people by private message when I felt like digging a little deeper.
Again, welcome, and I wish you health and peace.

[WoodBern82]

Poll feature not functioning.
I vote:  it was a mix of good and toxic.  For some they just endured the toxic component until they said enough.  I did my best to stay a distance from most of the pastors.  One that I trusted the most I would divulge some things. Thank God he moved on to a different occupation that still used his gifts for ministry. 

[Janet Easson Martin]

Lately I am navigating how much time to spend pushing forward mentally versus how much time to dig into what I experienced during GCM and kind of unpack those memories in order to fully heal from them. What about this forum has helped you the most?

-greenfieldsofglory

Relief and support at hearing people voice the pain I experienced about disturbing controls inside the GCx group. Reading posts from people who love the Lord, and reject the “religious” falsehoods of GCx. Realizing that rejecting GCx false teachings disguised as “undying loyalty to Christ” is not in any way condemned by God as we were taught to believe; but instead commended by God, setting us free to live in the Grace of Christ.

As far as the amount I could read and absorb, I had to start off slow. Otherwise, too many bad memories and feelings of the old shame were triggered by spending too much here. Though my intellect accepted the wrongness of what was done to us, part of my soul was sometimes overwhelmed with the amounts of twisting and manipulation I discovered along the way. I asked God to help me find in scripture what had happened to me. I knew it was there. Unraveling lies taught “in his name” from truth of who he really was and what he really wanted with me.

Honestly, it is shattering to parts of your mind and soul to learn the shocking truth, but the freedom and refreshment that come with being with Jesus as a clean, forgiven, and favored child have no comparison. Thankfully, it does seem to be revealed to us in layers rather than all at once.

[Huldah]

One way we process trauma is by talking (or writing) about it with others, and this forum has been my chance to do that. Naturally, I had told some of my story to a select few friends before I found this forum, but none of them really had a frame of reference for what I was talking about. "Talking" to people here, who already understood the teachings and practices of GC, was extremely helpful. In the long term, it helped me to distance myself emotionally from the abuse. There was also a sense of relief, that the exploitative secrets of the movement were finally being exposed to the light. And then there's been the chance to occasionally offer comfort or at least compassion to others who've been hurt by GC. I want them to know that leaving GC not only doesn't mean you're forsaking God, but that it can be a step toward pursuing Him more fully, without the leaders attempting to take the place of the Holy Spirit in your life.

[LostCreature3]

My poll vote: It was not a cult but it was unhealthy.

If Jim McCotter had stayed, I believe it would 100% be a cult.
Without him, I don't think they really know what to do or how to move forward.
There was a resurgence and strengthening of purpose that restarted things back in 2010 with Mark Darling at the helm. But once the 2018 investigation details came forth and the split happened, everything started falling apart again.

I believe that the unhealthy part of GCx churches began when their leadership actively pursued unity with the GCx movement, following and implementing old GCx
doctrine without question. If there was ever a part of leadership that had experience and expertise in being a part of the church outside of GCx, there was a better chance of a healthy church. But once that leadership is/was out and all that remains is Pro-GCx leadership, the church continues to become more unhealthy until there is no one left but the leadership and their families.