Hi, im from indonesia and i just DECOMMISSIONED

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[miranda123]

i left the gc church because of intimidation by the members and they so called "pastor"

i was introduced this church by an "ex-friend" at first she was really kind and a polite person.  about a year ago i met her when we hiked together. she is one of her pastor's favorite ( i dont know what to call it) in gc church. a week after that she chat me through LINE:
SHE: Do you want to join my church activity we going on tour to j*k*rta and visit ancol to refreshing.
ME: Why not? but i'm not a member of your church.is it cool?
SHE: sure, its not a problem.
ME: OK , i'm in.

so i went with them, first they seemed so friendly and gave me a smile , some of them introduced them self to me . it was a nice trip. days later she chat me again:
SHE: Do you want to come to our fellowship?
ME: sure , why not ( i was just graduated from collage and i thought it was a good activity)
SHE: okay

btw i had no intention to join gc  because i'm a member in other church. i think the fellowship was just about like i came and nothing happened i mean i didnt have to be the member of their church. so i came to several their fellowship but not too often it was like 2 or 3 times. Then to celebrate the independance day of indonesia they held a race and she asked me to join. There were like 4 teams, my team won and then we got $100 food voucher. but then they asked me to attend the church on sunday.. i guess why not? i participated on this race and i didnt want to make them feel like i just want their voucher.. so i attended their church, they gave me like BIG welcome , i was feeling kinda awkward and in the end of church service there was "welcome to 'my name' have a blessed sunday" i was like "wtf?", and then they asked me to register , i had to fill like name, place and date of birth, adress ,etc .so as time goes by i attended the church occasionally,

at that time i just graduated from collage and she (my ex-friend) offered me to work on her startup, so i worked for her for about like 2 months, and it was 2 months of hell, she treated me like i was her robot and asked me to come to the fellowship every wed after work at 6 pm. then i'm out of her startup and it was some kind like altercation between us. then 2 weeks after i quit ,on sunday i attended the church, the pastor was give a sermon to THROWING SOME KIND A SHADE AT ME saying i'm not grateful that i wanted higher salary,  i took advantage from her etc, i felt so dissapointed that she talked behind my back with the pastor and accused me of those things and also what kind of a pastor took side? and give a sermon of that he doesnt know what  the truth is,,at that time i knew something wrong with this church, this gc church system is like multi level marketing, they want to recruit people as many as possible , they want to save many "souls", they do whatever to make people come to their church, in fact only few people come to their church , they used their outside activity like "sunday hangout" to recruit young people, sometimes when i couldnt come or i reject their offers, they wanted me to tell them "why?" , like i had to give em every explanation to the "NO" answer. i feel intimidated, i started to not going to their fellowship but they kept insist and reminding me every wednesday. and she (my ex-friend)
labelled me as 'not a humble person' by not going to church and fellowship regurally 'not having attitude' 'dont want to learn(prev work issues)' and there are many more story but its too long to tell.

what they did to me:
-labelling, shaming, intimidation, ask me to recruit my friends,

the last time i know they throwing shade at me via group chat accusing me that i have" mental disorder and an angry nanny" btw i dont even close with them, i attended their fellowship and church just only few times and i know they judge me and shame me because i dont want to be one them. i never ever want to come back. so i remove that group chat and move on with my life.. i never want to contact that bitch (ex-friend) i mean she accused so many negative things

i felt like this is more like a cult than a church ,, i was shocked to finding out about  gcx  and gcwarning  i regretted to ever enter this church

sorry my english isn't really good but i want y'all to know this spiritual abusive experience.. thx

[Differentstrokes]

Welcome! I am sorry you had to deal with all that, but I am glad you found us here!

[Janet Easson Martin]

Hi Miranda123,

I, too, am sorry you were exploited, especially in a "church" setting.

What you shared is so typical of what GCx churches mistakenly call "discipling". The members make a false display of interest and excitement about you, as if you were instantaneously their best friend, in order to manipulate you to join them in nearly all their upcoming activities, and ultimately to join their church. This is usually the agenda in their relationship with you, and it is most likely NOT about your own personal interests. Their goal is to earn more respect and honor for themselves by "bringing" you and "adding" you to their "disciple collection". I am not joking. That is how dignity and esteem are obtained in GCx. More disciples, more dignity. I saw this first hand in my time there and realize now the rampant loss of true closeness and sincerity that is so essential for our soul.

I have been on both sides of the game; in the luring and being lured. Being on the 'lured' end can cause confusion, disappointment, and often offense and harm to our self-worth.

Faking real friendship to use people for one's own personal gain or agenda is modeled and caught from those 'above' you in GCx. It is so ingrained in the their culture that I found myself doing it (without realizing it) even after I left. But, God never wants me to use people for my own ambition. He has had to retrain my mind about relationships and how precious people and the friendships really are. Learning that individuals need to be honored and respected has been so freeing, satisfying, and relaxing to my soul.

I have found that as I am meditating on who and what God has really made me, I am given much grace to SINCERELY CARE about others' feelings and interests. I no longer have to be superficial and manipulative to earn others' approval in order to feel good about myself.

Glad you recognized the rudeness and insincerity, got out, and found this website. What you voiced is the hurt so many have unnecessarily suffered. It is probably quite therapeutic to many others that you shared your experience with what is general GCx exploitation and manipulation which they falsely label as "discipling".


Hoping in Him,

Janet