I'm back

Welcome to De-Commissioned, a place for former members of the Great Commission movement (aka GCM, GCC, GCAC, GCI, the Blitz) to discuss problems they've experienced in the association's practices and theology.

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[lham601]

So after a long sabbatical from this group I am back. my old long in was something along the lines of Sistanchrist but I don't remember it or my password.  I am looking forward to catching up with long time members of this group and to meet the new. My story and testimony is some where on here. It was transferred form the original de-comm site. Look for the one about being kicked out after being involved with a group of students from multiple campus ministries that put on a campus wide worship night.

So, the question of this season of life is, has anyone else found themselves in a craving for the community that many GCx churches offered initially, aka the feeling of being in a real family? The Scriptural principle of the church as a community/family not loosely connected groups of individuals comes into play here. I have come to find another church from a different line of churches that has a heavy focus on community and until the past about five months did things out of love and relationship instead of structure, now I am finding myself in a GCx like environment yet again. No worries, I am in the process of leaving/getting kicked out again while pushing for change. Anybody know how to resolve the need and the biblical mandate for community and real relationship with out being thrown back into a TACO?

[Linda]

Welcome back, sistanchrist! Nice to hear from you.

After leaving my GC church, I came to a realization that the family of God is all around me. There is still this idea that lingers that somehow, Christian friendships don't count unless they are fellow church member. I'm working on getting over this.

God bless you.

[BTDT]

So, the question of this season of life is, has anyone else found themselves in a craving for the community that many GCx churches offered initially, aka the feeling of being in a real family?

YES. In fact, our family may be looking to move to a different church soon, and finding a place with a strong sense of community is a big deal to me.

A good friend came from a TACO not unlike GC, and she feels the same way. Like me, she has yet to find a close church community like the ones we came from. We've wondered if it had something to do with those relationships being formed when we were relatively young. I've also wondered if it was a "war buddy" thing -- we went through tough times and good times together.

Not 100 percent sure how to do TACO avoidance, but looking at less-"independent" churches might help - assuming more accountability to an established denomination.

[lham601]

Good perspectives. So much of Scripture refers to believers in community that are committed to authentic real relationships with each other. Hence the "one another" verses. Most mainstream Western Christianity is focused on the individual which is only a part of the Biblical paradigm. The question is, why do so many if not most community, relationally minded churches either implode or become controlling TACOs. I am sure that a good part of it is the American individualistic culture, but... wow. For any that are looking for a community oriented church after having escaped GCx, careful. It is easy to fall back into the same traps.

So, the question of this season of life is, has anyone else found themselves in a craving for the community that many GCx churches offered initially, aka the feeling of being in a real family?

YES. In fact, our family may be looking to move to a different church soon, and finding a place with a strong sense of community is a big deal to me.

A good friend came from a TACO not unlike GC, and she feels the same way. Like me, she has yet to find a close church community like the ones we came from. We've wondered if it had something to do with those relationships being formed when we were relatively young. I've also wondered if it was a "war buddy" thing -- we went through tough times and good times together.

Not 100 percent sure how to do TACO avoidance, but looking at less-"independent" churches might help - assuming more accountability to an established denomination.

[Innerlight]

Sorry, you have to help me here.  What does TACO stand for?

[BTDT]

Sorry, you have to help me here.  What does TACO stand for?

That's the acronym Larry Pile has used to describe organaizations that hold to the basic Christian tenets, but have strong aberrancies and totalist practices.

http://gcxweb.org/Misc/LarryPile-OtherSideOfDiscipleship.aspx

Groups with these restrictive characteristics I have labeled “totalist aberrant Christian organizations” (TACOs). They are “totalist” by virtue of their attempts to control almost every area of the member’s life. They are “aberrant” in that they teach doctrines and practices that, though they cannot be called actually heretical, they are yet “eccentric” in the literal sense of “off center” – out of line with historic, orthodox Christianity. Thus they must be recognized as genuine, if non-mainstream, “Christian organizations.” The term TACO is appropriate for another reason: the groups are so close to the truth, and the error is so subtle, that when one tries to get a grip on the problem one has great difficulty holding things together long enough to get a good “bite” on it!

[Innerlight]

Got it, thanks!  Basically you can't nail them down.

[Linda]

So, the question of this season of life is, has anyone else found themselves in a craving for the community that many GCx churches offered initially, aka the feeling of being in a real family? The Scriptural principle of the church as a community/family not loosely connected groups of individuals comes into play here.

I've been thinking about this post a lot. I think what caught my eye is the word "initially" in your sentence. I think we all have a need for "community". God answers that need with the Church. Big C.

What happens in "sects" like GC is that the word "church" gets redefined to mean the local church and/or the association/denomination with which the local church is affiliated. The initial sense is community. When you leave the sense is rejection.

This false unity can be very destructive and highly divisive. These groups preach unity, but what they really mean is loyalty to the group. If they truly cared about unity among Christians, they would not teach commitment to the local church for life.

What happens when you leave a GC church is that you lose your friends and you lose the community you had with them. This should not be. This is wrong. This is a sign that something is wrong with the group. It is at best a sect, at worst a cult.

Friendships with other believers should not be conditional – depending on whether or not you attend their church. When friends dissociate with you because you leave, they are in error.  It still hurts. I'm sorry you have been experiencing that again.

[Anonymous]

So, the question of this season of life is, has anyone else found themselves in a craving for the community that many GCx churches offered initially, aka the feeling of being in a real family?

I have been thinking a lot about this statement in the past few days. I read this probably a week ago, or fairly close to when you posted this, and this has somewhat been haunting me.

To answer this, yes, I have. I have been finding that GCC does a really good job of getting this community. It comes at a cost. Depending on what specific church you are associated with, this cost might be different - some churches are more controlling than others, some are more prone to the "TACO" mentality, etc.

But what is haunting is the question as to whether you can have the same sense of community without feeling cultish. Whether or not the two are inseparable to some extent. I'm not sure you can have just the sense of community. I really hope you can? Maybe? Or is this something you just have to accept as part of any super strong community type of church...


Combined with - http://www.jonacuff.com/stuffchristianslike/2011/07/the-tell/ - I've been thinking a whole ton as of late though about this entire issue you ask in your question.

[EverAStudent]

So, the question of this season of life is, has anyone else found themselves in a craving for the community that many GCx churches offered initially, aka the feeling of being in a real family?

Probably the answer is yes, but only if the "others" are involved with you in a serious Christian initiative.  Sadly, I think, in the US we play at church and play at Christianity more than we are engaged in Kingdom work.  Congregants play at the prosperity and leisure game while leaders play at the "publish me into being a celebrity" game. 

That does not mean that GC is also not playing around, because they are playing a different game, "self agrandizement."  The followers may be sincere to one degree or another, but the sincerity is to please leaders and to glorify the church (growth, repulation, etc.). 

I think when people are working together to advance Christ and His Kingdom then there is that close fellowship without the cultish feeling or the insincerity.

[Innerlight]

Everastudent.....I coudn't agree more!

[blonde]

Sistanchrist: I sometimes miss the core passion and deep famiy feelings that I got from Great Commision International and the small group I was involved with.  It was Steve Barnes who introduced me at the first go so many years ago.

[AgathaL'Orange]

I found that the "passion" of GC kept me from living in my community fully.  The emphasis on living apart from the world kept me from being close to my neighbors, family, co-workers, fellow students, and peers.  I sometimes miss the spiritual highs, but honestly, I really like the freedom and new world of getting to know people in my natural circles as well.  I like the extra time I have to socialize and raise my family.  I'm glad that my church doesn't take all my time now.

[Mei Chuen]

Dear Sistanchrist--I left GCC to become an (Eastern) Orthodox Christian.  Not your usual sequel, but one that several others on this site have also followed.  The Orthodox Church is the most direct continuation of the first century church, in the historical, the doctrinal, and government sense of continuation.  In my experience of the last 15 years, this involves a far-reaching and unusual sense of community, as you say that you are looking for a sense of community.  I have been in services in other languages, but comprehend exactly what is going on.  The sense of community involves not only the circa 250 million Orthodox Christians worldwide, but also all those throughout the last 20 centuries who have lived, suffered and died for their faith.  Doctrine, established in the first century, was clarified and hedged about from the 4th to the 8th centuries, and has not changed since then.  Liturgical practice, with a complex set of services for every day of the year, comes straight from the practice in the catacomb churches, but has been shortened. (Fewer long, long prayers and reading of a small portion of a gospel instead of a whole gospel at a service. That's right, because most people were illiterate, they would read Matthew, Mark, Luke or John in their entirety.)  Government in the church is a collegial effort of all bishops within a particular geographical entity.  (All bishops in the US have several meetings a year during which they determine new members of the priesthood and diaconate, and hammer out issues, but never tamper with doctrine or Holy Tradition.)  Go find an Orthodox Church near you, and get a taste of it.  It is somewhat a shock to modern, evangelical sensibilities, but is worth a look, and holds up under intense investigation.

Best wishes in your search for stability and community,
Your sister, Mei Chuen.