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March 29, 2024, 07:53:40 am *
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Author Topic: Left college church in southeast  (Read 10950 times)
lovebombed
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« on: January 10, 2017, 06:46:29 pm »

After talking with a friend, I figured it was time to put a bit of my story on here. The brief version is that I came from a broken family and was sucked right into the great commission system on campus  with promises of a family and friends and places to go on weekends and holidays. I bought it, and the twisted gospel and the expectation of doing a gcm related thing everyday, including spending hours a week doing fake surveys to try to get people to let us show them the bridge diagram. Long story short, I wound up on leadership and spending summers as a missionary on summer project and leading multiple bible studies and root groups a week. I married someone from the church and after a while, they commuted suicide. The church, being ill equipped for such things, with untrained and unprepared staff and bad theology, blamed me for not being enough for my mentally unwell spouse - and in short order I was shamed and I left the church. People who had been my family, I thought, abandoned me in this time of greatest need and greatest grief (ignoring the command they/we had  often repeated to care for orphans and widows--- adopt all the babies! Marry young and have a quiverful! --- when in actual widow was in their midst and on their campus.
I'll post about the rest of my story later- it's more abandonment over theology and the like- but it's not all bad. I've lived a lot of adventure since and have gone on to pastor in much healthier environments.
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Loro
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« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2017, 06:54:18 pm »

So sorry to see what they did to you....abondon you when you need them most. That's what they did to me and so many others. People in those churches are some of the most cruel people I have ever encountered. Please share more when God leads you to do so. It helps me to know I am not alone.
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Janet Easson Martin
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« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2017, 07:53:49 pm »

Lovebombed, so glad you shared with us here this heavy burden that was so irresponsibly and cruelly laid upon you by such unloving, uncaring ill-spirited people.  That is the worst possible thing you could have been told.  We will pray for you, Lovebombed.  That God would show you so clearly how wrong they were.  That he would confirm his lavish love for you and favor toward you.  That he would use you in delightful purposes.  That he would make the deserts of your past like Eden (Is. 51:3). That he would set you above your oppressors. 

There are people who can care very understandingly and supportively for those who have experienced what you've been through. I hope you have encountered them. 

I am glad you left and have experienced adventures since.  Pharisaical churches like GCx are no place for real people and real problems.


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For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
Huldah
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« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2017, 10:03:53 pm »

Welcome to the forum. I'm so very sorry about your spouse's suicide and about all the cruelty you were subjected to.
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MisterPenguin42
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« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2017, 06:00:26 pm »

I knew someone who went through something similar at the GCM church I went to. I wasn't at the church at the time, but it was tragic to hear when I got back. These people were pretty amazing. It sucked to have two tragedies; the loss of a spouse and the loss of a family. I hope they and you are doing much, much better.
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