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Author Topic: BEWARE of “Spiritual Abuse”  (Read 1418 times)
Janet Easson Martin
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« on: January 21, 2021, 09:34:08 pm »

Though this is long, it is extremely helpful in identifying Spiritual Abuse.  If you are wondering about someone who is claiming they are speaking for God, or a group of leaders who are assuming spiritual authority over you, the following article (copied from Christian Broadcasting Network online) should be quite helpful.  It may be just what you are looking for.  



Beware of "Spiritual Abuse"
By Craig von Buseck
CBN.com Contributing Writer


CBN.com -- A discussion of godly counsel must include a caution concerning the sticky issue of “spiritual abuse.”

Spiritual abuse can be difficult to detect at first if you have never encountered it. In a manipulative church, the pastor or senior leaders have subtly positioned themselves to take the place of the Holy Spirit in people's lives. They may try to put undue influence on the choices that people in their congregation are making. They might try to sway someone’s decision in a matter to keep them under their control, or to keep them from leaving the church.

People in a controlling church are often told they cannot leave the church with God's blessing unless the pastor approves the decision. They are warned that if they don’t follow the pastor’s guidance, not only will God not bless them, but they will also bring a curse upon themselves or their family. Leaving the “covering” of the church and the controlling pastor will result in some sort of calamity.

When a pastor tells his congregation that those who leave his church or disobey his authority are in danger of God’s wrath, you can be sure this man is operating in a spirit of control. He is attempting to sow fear as a carnal means of keeping people in his church.

“If you leave this church,” he may warn, “the blessing of God will be lifted from your life, and you will miss God’s will. You will be in rebellion, and you will open yourself up to all kinds of calamity. The devil will have freedom to attack you because you have walked away from God’s protection,” that “protection” being the one true church that he happens to pastor.

Fear is the motivation behind such comments — not love. You can be sure that this type of reasoning is not from God. Jesus never motivated people out of fear. Fear is a form of manipulation, which is sin. Instead of motivating people through love and a call to serve the body of Christ and reach the lost, a spiritually abusive minister will try to motivate through manipulation.

The apostle John is called the apostle of love because he wrote so much about our call as Christians to walk in love. 'There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear,' he wrote in 1 John 4:18.

By keeping people in fear, controlling spiritual leaders work to get good Christian people to build their religious kingdoms — by telling them that they are building the kingdom of God. We see this kind of prophet and priest in the book of Jeremiah. The controlling leaders are focused on their own needs being met, and the needs of the people are ignored.

Jesus was more critical of the religious leaders of His day than He was of the sinners, and for good reason. The Jewish leaders put false religious burdens on the people for the sake of their own prosperity.

They crush you with impossible religious demands and never lift a finger to help ease the burden. (Matthew 23:4)

In this case, as it is in controlling churches today, the people were burdened with rules and regulations that needed to be performed to gain the acceptance of the religious leaders — in that day the Pharisees. Today, it is the manipulative spiritual leader. Many Christians today find themselves bearing the heavy load of the religious baggage in an abusive system. Around the world, hurting churchgoers struggle to earn the favor and approval of a modern-day Pharisee, all the while thinking they are earning the favor of God.

The good news is that if you are in Christ, you already have God’s favor! And no amount of work for a spiritually abusive pastor will give you more acceptance than you already have.

Jesus recognized the burden that was being placed on sincere believers in His time, who just wanted to do what is right. He saw them as sheep without a shepherd, even though they were involved in the religious rituals in the temple and synagogues.

They were bewildered (harassed and distressed and dejected and helpless), like sheep without a shepherd.
—Matthew 9:36 AMP

In his book, Exposing Spiritual Abuse, Mike Fehlauer points out that Jesus saw these dear people as harassed: “This word conveys the idea of some outside force pressing upon the people, causing them to feel weary, distressed and downcast. This outside force was the religious system that placed its emphasis on outward appearances. It was a system that promised peace based on one's ability to follow the prescribed rules and regulations. If one failed, then there was judgment.”

“Not having a shepherd didn't mean that the people lacked for those who told them what to do,” he continues. “There were plenty of Pharisees willing to do that. It meant they had no one to lead them to spiritual green pastures. A shepherd doesn't drive his sheep as cattlemen drive their cattle. A shepherd leads his sheep to a safe place where food is plentiful and where they can find rest.”

The term shepherd is an Old Testament metaphor as well. Ezekiel 34 contains an exhortation in which the Lord holds the leaders of Israel responsible for failing to care for the flock:

Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel, prophesy and say to them, “Thus says the Lord GOD to the shepherds: ‘Woe to the shepherds of Israel who feed themselves! Should not the shepherds feed the flocks?You eat the fat and clothe yourselves with the wool; you slaughter the fatlings, but you do not feed the flock. The weak you have not strengthened, nor have you healed those who were sick, nor bound up the broken, nor brought back what was driven away, nor sought what was lost; but with force and cruelty you have ruled them. So they were scattered because there was no shepherd.’”
—Ezekiel 34:2–5

I wonder if these modern-day Pharisees realize that God considers their congregations as sheep without shepherds. Perhaps if they recognized how God viewed the situation, they would change their ways.

The Christian seeking guidance from a spiritual leader must also be on the lookout for the dangerous trap of spiritual elitism that can produce an "us-and-them," or a “fortress” mentality. This is a telltale sign of spiritual abuse. A church or pastor with an elitist attitude teaches, if ever so subtly, that no other church or ministry is preaching the pure gospel — or at least, no one is preaching it the way they should, in other words, the way that he is preaching it. An elitist leader will discourage members from visiting other churches or receiving counsel from anyone who doesn't attend their church. If anyone breaks this rule, he or she is viewed as rebellious.

We see a biblical example of this in 3 John 9–10:

I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to have the preeminence among them, does not receive us. Therefore, if I come, I will call to mind his deeds which he does, prating against us with malicious words. And not content with that, he himself does not receive the brethren, and forbids those who wish to, putting them out of the church.

Spiritual elitism is not a new thing in the church, but the apostle John rightly called it “evil.”

A healthy spiritual leader, on the other hand, respects and encourages the other churches and ministries in a community, recognizing that there are several different expressions of the body of Christ. A spiritually free pastor realizes that no one denomination or local church can represent the love of Jesus to a city. A healthy church will promote revival in the entire Christian community. It will not promote the idea that it has some kind of doctrinal or spiritual superiority.

In a healthy relationship, a spiritual mentor will provide godly counsel from selfless motives. He or she will want God’s will for your life. If that means that you will need to leave the church or ministry, then they will rejoice that you are being sent out to be a blessing in another place.

A healthy pastoral relationship should produce peace in the life of the believer — another one of the seven keys of God’s guidance. If the godly counsel that you receive is not giving you peace or rest in your soul, it may not be from the Lord.
Remember, godly counsel is only one of the seven keys of God’s guidance. You should never rely solely on the advice or input from another human being in determining God’s will for you life — regardless of how long they have been walking with the Lord.

Because man is a sinner, building healthy spiritual relationships will always be a challenge. Someone once said, “the perfect church stopped being perfect the minute I walked in the door.” God's intention all along has been for the local church to be healthy, life-giving, serving, encouraging, and Christ-centered. But because He has chosen to use sinful men and women to lead His church, there will always be the possibility that a local congregation can fall into deception or unhealthy spiritual patterns.

There must be a balance between humbly seeking guidance from a person of spiritual authority, and subjecting yourself to the manipulative practice of spiritual abuse. Finding that balance is an ongoing process in life. But it is a necessary struggle that will prevent you from becoming weary and worn on one hand, trying to jump through religious hoops that promise God's acceptance and love — and on the other hand, from becoming an island unto yourself, determining what is right in your eyes alone. Both sides of this spiritual spectrum are dangerous, and should be avoided. Ask God to give you the grace and guidance to walk in the tension of these truths — opening yourself to the input of mature Christian leaders, while avoiding spiritual control.

If you find yourself striving to gain the acceptance of spiritual leaders, or if your church constantly requires more and more of your life with no end in sight — and little encouragement along the way — then you may want to re-examine the church you are attending.

We can protect ourselves from spiritual abuse by considering all the keys of God's guidance in every major decision.

Do you need to pray with someone? Call our CBN Prayer Line at 1-800-759-0700.

Do you want to know Jesus? Find out how!

I go into greater detail in how to hear God's voice through godly counsel in my book, Seven Keys to Hearing God's Voice. Order your copy from Shop CBN.

Also order your copy of Exposing Spiritual Abuse, by Mike Fehlauer

Adapted from Seven Keys to Hearing God's Voice. Used with permission. © Hensley Publishing. More from Hensley Publishing.

Craig's books on ShopCBN

NetCasters: Using the Internet to Make Fishers of Men Kindle Version

Download Seven Keys to Hearing God's Voice Leaders Guide

Craig von Buseck is Ministries Director for CBN.com. More from Craig on CBN.com.

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« Last Edit: January 25, 2021, 09:48:23 am by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
PietWowo
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« Reply #1 on: January 22, 2021, 12:06:28 am »

Another opinion of someone, who has no historical or cultural idea on what Pharisees are or Jewish culture was. There are seven types of Pharisees. (Google it). Paul considered himself to be "a Pharisee and a son of Pharisees", that was after his third missionary journey.... Acts 23:6. Look it up.

Now, that doesn't mean that abuse is correct. But if you want to talk about "spiritual leaders" that are abusive, look at the Sadducees. They were extremely corrupt. So corrupt that with King Alexander Jannaeus, they had around 800 Pharisees crucified (about 80 BC). But Pharisees were known to be very humble men, who loved God.... However with some Pharisees they were just acting.... (Greek word there is hypocrisy.)  Jesus referred to those Pharisees as white painted tombs. He said that on the Southern steps leaving the temple, where Rabbi would teach.... And on the left there were all of these white beautiful tombs going up to the Mount of Olives from the Kedron valley. They are still there. Anyways, besides Paul, Gamaliel was a Pharisee, Hillel was a Pharisee, Nicodemus was a Pharisee...

So, for instance if one compared Jim McCotter to a Pharisee, he would probably like it, if he had studied what Pharisees were like (I don't know if he has). One of Jim McCotter's big teaching is to become just like the Apostle Paul.... so if he had studied it, he would probably take it as a compliment if you told him that he was a Pharisee. Depending on which of the seven types of Pharisees you were talking about, I would take it as a compliment... But I would hate it if someone called me a Sadducee... They were corrupt to the core. Bribing the Romans...

Besides that if you read the Scriptures about how the believers in the church function, you need to understand that It is talking to communities. Not individuals.... That somehow is lost in translation, because in English the word "you" means both singular you (you personally) and plural you (All of you all). Most languages have the single and plural second person, but English has it as just "you."  But all that is to say that many times the Scriptures address believers as a group, not as individuals.... That's not an Middle Eastern way of thinking about things. That would be more of an Hellenistic way... which emphasizes You Personal.... like "your personal relationship with God..."  There is truth to that, but it's not taught that way in the Scriptures, if you go back to the original languages within their original cultures....
« Last Edit: January 29, 2021, 06:26:59 pm by PietWowo » Logged
Janet Easson Martin
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« Reply #2 on: August 15, 2021, 05:17:52 pm »


A Reliable Definition of Spiritual Abuse


Interestingly, I read just the other day how Pat Robertson and CBN took a stand against the spiritual abuse found among the shepherding movement of the 70’s. I’ll try to find that very link and add it to this post. Still today CBN seems to be a healthy and reliable source in this area.

There are still many who are trying to make heads or tails of GCx. It is a tangled web of lies and truth. Understanding the manipulation of many key scriptures they employed to keep their people silenced and isolated takes time; wise christian friends or counselors; pouring out your confusion and pain to God and listening to him inaudibly speak to your heart while praying and reading His Word; paying attention to what he makes jump off the pages of your Bible; and trusting his wisdom more than our own understanding. Reading biblically sound books or sites about Spiritual Abuse often helps us to learn how we may have been deeply impacted by it.

Another balanced resource of spiritual abuse is “Christianity Today”. One short article they came out with this past year highlights a particular book as a guiding reference on this subject, “Escaping the Maze of Spiritual Abuse” by Oakley and Humphrey. The author of this article commends their definition of it and reformats it to make it simpler as follows:


...why we all need to turn to Lisa Oakley and Justin Humphrey’s definition in their important study of spiritual abuse called Escaping the Maze of Spiritual Abuse: Creating healthy Christian cultures. This book, or at least one like it, should be on every pastor’s bookshelf and available to both elders/deacons and congregants. ...

Today, their definition, I reformat to make it simpler:


Spiritual abuse is a form of emotional and psychological abuse.

It is characterized by a systematic pattern of coercive and controlling behaviour in a religious context.

Spiritual abuse can have a deeply damaging impact on those who experience it.

This abuse may include:

manipulation and exploitation,
enforced accountability,
censorship of decision making,
requirements for secrecy and silence,
coercion to conform, [inability to ask questions]
control through the use of sacred texts or teaching,
requirement of obedience to the abuser,
the suggestion that the abuser has a ‘divine’ position,
isolation as a means of punishment,
and superiority and elitism.



Link to CT article:
https://www.christianitytoday.com/scot-mcknight/2020/december/what-is-spiritual-abuse-working-definition.html


Link to Wikipedia Page on “Shepherding Movement”, ‘Pat Robertson’s Opposition’
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shepherding_movement


« Last Edit: August 15, 2021, 06:02:57 pm by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
Janet Easson Martin
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« Reply #3 on: August 26, 2021, 09:43:43 pm »


The Shepherding Movement Abuse

Excerpts from a Brief Summary



Following is an excerpt from a VERY informative summary of this “movement” in Mary Alice Chrnalogar’s book, “Twisted Scriptures”. Note the just measures of repentance taken by some guilty of using it to suppress their people. Through their honesty and humility there was some real healing as a result. I have made bold those words or phrases that might be especially helpful to note. Taken from Appendix 2:



Shepherding/Discipleship/Accountability Groups: A Brief History

... The result of their corrupted teaching soon showed a dark side. It was not because of imperfect men that this corruption grew, as is generally blamed, but mainly due to the non-Biblical teaching of what “being more accountable” supposedly meant. In practice, this teaching of “more accountability” frequently meant suppression of freedom of expression and action, and pressure to give up one’s own convictions when these differed from those of the leaders. This in turn created mental anguish and moral dilemmas for many disciples. A Christian magazine reported in 1990 that:

…the movement quickly became elitist, exclusive. Operating on the basis that everyone needs to be accountable to a pastor, “sheep” were assigned to various “shepherds”—many of whom were young, immature, sometimes arrogant and often proud of their new authority. Havoc followed and horror stories abounded. Families were sometimes forced to relocate from one city to another at the whim of a shepherd. Churches split…Mumford and Simpson in particular took the heat from the critics, who charged they dominated those under them…Critics cited numerous examples of “shepherds” who required their “sheep” to ask their permission before they dated, changed jobs, or made major decisions.

The shepherding leaders responded that they were teaching a renewed Biblical understanding of God’s government: delegated authority, and covenant loyalty. But soon other national leaders opposed them. During a 700 Club broadcast, Pat Robertson called Mumford, Simpson, and Prince “false teachers,” and compared the discipleship movement to the cult led by Jim Jones, saying the only difference was “the shepherds had not yet served Kool-Aid,” a reference to the mass suicide of more than 900 members of Jones’s group who drank poisoned Kool-Aid on his command. Robertson banned the shepherding leaders from appearing on any of his radio or television outlets.

The conflict over the shepherding movement seemed to reach a turning point in 1990, when a Christian magazine quoted on their cover:

Discipleship was wrong. I repent. I ask forgiveness…discipleship resulted in unhealthy submission resulting in perverse and un-Biblical obedience to human leaders…for the injury and shame, I repent with sorrow and ask for your forgiveness.

This admission of unhealthy submission and non-Biblical obedience to human leaders shook the foundation of discipleship in America. Many leaders in this movement followed and repented of the abuses. “All the men except Simpson and Baxter ‘released’ their disciples to find their own way.” No longer were these disciples to be in complete obedience to men who were in spiritual oversight of their souls. Since that time, discipleship programs have been dropped by literally hundreds of thousands of people. The movement has continued to shrink as the abuses and the non-Scriptural base of some of the teachings are exposed. But it spawned eggs that even today continue to hatch.

In 1991, The Word of God Community in Ann Arbor, Michigan released their people from those in spiritual oversight. The leaders of this community recognized that many members had caused themselves suffering by their submission in this movement. These leaders asked Reverend James LeBar, a specialist on cults, to organize a seminar along with psychologist Margaret Singer and several other experts. The program was a great success in healing this flock.

The problems in the Word of God group, according to Tom Yoder, an eight-year former member, were (among other things):

militancy, control, elitism, hierarchicalism, black and white interpretations, pressure to perform, loss of identity, loss of freedom, spirit and soul, suppression of the “created” self, dependency, loss of personal initiative, extreme negative world view, extreme sex role differentiation, extreme loyalty.
...



I believe people must be willing to ignore or quench the Holy Spirit in order to carry out a “vision” that is not of God. Kind of funny that McCotter claimed special revelation on something that was spawning across various pockets of believers at that time quite likely from “Christian” authors who suggested such methods. Perhaps these “new doctrines” had demonic persuasion to wreak havoc among God’s people. Possibly they appealed to those seeking “worldly” success more than Jesus. Add to it McCotter’s deception and denial, and you have the mess that is GCx.

Since I am using such a large portion from Ms. Chrnalogar’s book I feel I must include this link to her Kindle book below:

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=Twisted+scriptures+Mary+Alice+chronologies&ref=nb_sb_noss


« Last Edit: August 28, 2021, 04:53:54 pm by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
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