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March 28, 2024, 05:14:36 am *
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Author Topic: Story Behind Deleted Post?  (Read 3673 times)
FYI
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« on: May 28, 2018, 08:19:26 pm »

Anyone know the purpose of this post and why it was removed a couple hours later on March 25th?  We now know it was sent to Mr. LYDEN and by the person XXXX XXXXXXX.

Posted by Still Learning on 3/25/2018:

http://forum.gcmwarning.com/people-and-places-of-gc/pastor-mark-darling-pastor-that-abused-me/msg16211/?topicseen#new

I don't have the time or the mental energy to have word battles or opinion swapping. 
However, at this time, we felt it necessary to act and support those who need support.

We were requested to send a letter to an investigative reporter in Mpls.
This is what we sent (along with a copy of our original letter from 1992):

March 24, 2018

Dear Mr. XXXXX (TV News):

Over 20 years ago my husband and I sent a letter (attached) to the leadership of Great Commission Churches regarding our concerns with Mark Darlings’ teachings and his being unqualified for the calling of pastor.  Someone not involved in a church would probably find this letter boring and think it’s splitting scriptural hairs.  Our concerns were basically Mark’s using the Bible to justify his behavior and his nonchalant and sometimes bullying attitude when someone would question his authority.  We had both been in this church for over 15 years, and were not just nitpicking, but expected our concerns would be thoughtfully considered.

But, we were quickly told if we didn’t agree we should leave.  And, we did.  Decades have passed.  We have moved on.  Now, we hear that Mark was and has been using his “power” as a pastor to lure women to be open about their sexual lives (like pornography for the ears).  Although rape was not involved (that we know of), the abuse of this power of “pastor” (read: “I am your authority, and you should trust me and be totally open to me.”) should be confronted and named openly as abuse.

In business it is common to have a leader who is charismatic and a good talker (sometimes twisting the truth); but if that leader brings in clients and makes the company money--it’s okay.  At this time in history, however, when such a leader is exposed as being sexually abusive to women that leader is reprimanded and fired.
 
Mark Darling is not the only culpable one in these situations (as we are learning in most cases of sexual abuse).  Leaders and pastors working with him for decades have excused, covered, and protected Mark, and not listened to congregant’s concerns.  The Board of Great Commission Churches (interestingly made up entirely of men) now have a dilemma.  Do they again back their fellow pastor accused of abuse, or listen to the abused women?  It’s not just Mark Darling’s offense now—but, also their own disregard of people who they, as pastors, should be helping and protecting.

We personally know some of these women who have told the truth about Mark Darling (and others who do not yet have the courage to come forward).  We can vouch for their integrity and applaud their candor and openness.  Our hope is that Mark will not just be “forgiven” for mistakes and everything will be fine; but that the men in leadership will defend and help the women who have been wounded.  Another casualty is Mark Darling himself.  Although he is a charismatic and gifted speaker who brings in numerous people and can sway the crowd with his sermons, he is a wounded man needing psychological and emotional help. We fear that nothing, again, will be done.  Hopefully that will not be the case.

Thank you for listening.

Sincerely,   
XXXX XXXXXXXX

P.S. For a better understanding of this combination of spiritual and sexual abuse, here is a 10-minute video by Psychologist James Finley.  Do not be distracted by his mannerisms; he has worked with numerous cases and personally experienced abuse himself.  https://vimeo.com/240742119  (Start at 2:00, if you have limited time—and listen especially at 3:15, 5:00, 6:00 and 8:45)
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Watching
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« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2018, 03:46:39 am »

.Thank you for re-posting.  Interesting.  The referenced video does a really good job in explaining abusive situations where there is a power differential, and why those in situations like that find it very difficult to explain their abuse. Worth watching.
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Rebel in a Good Way
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« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2018, 05:11:49 am »

You could private message Still Learning and ask them rather than re-posting something they obviously changed their mind about and decided to delete. 
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FYI
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« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2018, 05:22:33 am »

I attempted to but Still Learning user name does not exist in the Forum.
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« Reply #4 on: May 29, 2018, 05:27:45 am »

It's still on there.  Under search for members I just typed in Still, and a number of usernames came up, including StillLearning
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margaret
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« Reply #5 on: May 29, 2018, 05:43:20 am »

Wow. Excellent video.
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