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Author Topic: McCotter Poison  (Read 53669 times)
Janet Easson Martin
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« Reply #120 on: January 17, 2022, 06:35:38 pm »


McCotter Poison

Preying Upon Sheep



Linda (and perhaps others) found this biblically wise psychologist some time ago, who confronts abuse and obviously carries a calling especially for those wounded inside the church. Her latest book is “Redeeming Power: Understanding Authority and Abuse in the Church.”

In addition to serving on boards for several Christian Ministries which address trauma, and writing a number of books, Dr. Langberg also has her own practice near Philadelphia, PA with 16 clinicians. I would guess in the event of COVID at least some of the therapists see patients online or over the phone, so distance may not be an issue. Here is here website: https://www.dianelangberg.com/

On the website I found an article she wrote that speaks very clearly and directly to spiritual abuse in the church. I believe she is also prayerfully addressing leaders covering up such abuse. I have included excerpts below:



When the Sheep are Preyed Upon

Acknowledging the Tragic Reality of the Church's Spiritual Abuse Problem

Diane Langberg



A church that follows her Head, the Good and Great Shepherd, is a refuge for the flock, a place of green pastures and clear waters, a place of restoration for wounded sheep and most certainly, a place that fights off the wolves. The secular and religious news media have globally exposed the fact that not only are there wolves in the fold, we have, in the name of our God, protected their place among God’s sheep by complicity, cover-up, and deceit. We have protected the institution of shepherding rather than the sheep. This results in untold damage being done to the body of Christ by those who name his name. ...

Leaders engaged in spiritual abuse use their position and words to coerce another by manipulating, deceiving, or humiliating them. They say, “God says . . .” followed by words that do not reflect the character of our God. ...

I believe as Christ-followers we are called to wrestle with the issue of abuse in Christian circles, fearlessly facing what is happening and the harm being done to vulnerable and precious people dearly loved by God.

...an ability to articulate theological truths does not mean the speaker is an obedient servant of God. ...

Sometimes that “servant of God” turns out to be a bully, working the system and its people to feed himself, taking what he thinks he needs or deserves. When this happens, it’s often confusing, and others may excuse the behavior. ...

But over time a pattern is revealed as decisions are made and actions taken to benefit or preserve the leader rather than care for the followers. The leader—and others with power—believe that if he fails, the whole system everyone has worked so hard to build will go down. The system is protected rather than the sheep. The “mission” controls leadership rather than the Master.

Leaders and followers in such a system become focused on serving the system rather than serving God. But the system is not the Savior. It’s an easy deception to fall into, but it leads to hiding, ignoring, or denying malignant toxins that then go untreated. Sexual abuse, domestic violence, the abuse of power, arrogance, and many other things take root. The system has the equivalent of untreated cancer. ...

The position and authority of leaders are coupled with scriptures that are twisted to protect the system, rather than keeping the sheep of God’s pasture safe. The damage is devastating, often with lifelong repercussions.

... The unstated, but governing purpose becomes attracting more people, raising more money, or achieving greater renown. We end up building systems on a foundation of deception rather than on Jesus. As a result, we practice oppression, silencing, dehumanizing violence, arrogance, and corruption. We deceive ourselves, protecting within our systems the very toxins that will kill it if left untended. ...

No so-called Christian system is truly God’s work unless it fleshes out his character. Toleration of sin, pretense, and crookedness do not reveal the character of God, even if they bear his name. Arrogance is never godly. Covering up sin is never godly. Abuse of power is never godly. Shepherds who feed on sheep are abusive. Leadership that preserves and protects the system, rather than the people, turns the house of God into a safe place for predators. Those who come to feed on God himself find themselves being the main course instead.


From the full article:

https://erlc.com/resource-library/spotlight-articles/when-the-sheep-are-preyed-upon/



« Last Edit: January 20, 2022, 11:34:20 am by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
Janet Easson Martin
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« Reply #121 on: January 18, 2022, 01:52:15 pm »

If you Google “Complex Trauma Diane Langberg” there is a helpful “time-mark” breakdown (on the initial search page) of her talk to educate Christian Leaders helping people with complex trauma in their ministries. “Complex” differing from “PTSD” in that the Trauma was repetitive for years (quite possibly from more than one source) rather than an event. This seems to fit very well with the kind of trauma suffered by children of abusive discipline by some GCx parents; and the very twisted representation of God in the home and GCx Church resulting in perceived worthlessness, rejection and punishment of themselves.

I cannot emphasize enough how clear and extremely helpful Dr. Langberg is in putting together the puzzle pieces of this newly recognized type of trauma. While listening I found myself taking deep sighs of relief when understanding why I respond the way I do. It moves me to be more merciful and patient with myself and others. I believe many children and adults suffered under such abuse for years from the teaching and practices of GCx and still may live with the fallout from the resulting Complex Trauma.

Toward the end, Dr. Langberg says the way to recovery is to reverse the abuse. In my own words, if there was silence, there lies a deep need to voice the abuse. Where there was shame and hiding there needs to be a safe place to be heard, seen and treated honorably. Where there was rejection and demanded perfection, there needs to be an environment of unconditional love and grace.  

There are so many healing truths and tools in this talk. I feel any could take away just one to give them a new outlook of hope and healing.



Here is the initial search page with the talk timeline.

https://www.google.com/search?q=complex+trauma+diane+langberg&rlz=1C9BKJA_enUS741US741&oq=complex+trauma+diane&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0i22i30.14025j0j7&hl=en-US&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8https://www.google.com/search?q=complex+trauma+diane+langberg&rlz=1C9BKJA_enUS741US741&oq=complex+trauma+diane&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0i22i30.14025j0j7&hl=en-US&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8



Actual Talk -
Complex Trauma: Understanding and Treatment, Diane Langberg

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=otxAuHG9hKo



« Last Edit: January 20, 2022, 11:32:04 am by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
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« Reply #122 on: February 22, 2022, 07:57:18 pm »

Previously, we discussed traumatic child rearing that McCotter practiced and taught; including through the real stories of some children growing up in the church group he founded. Sadly, some similarities may have been common to the Duggar family, as are now being exposed.

When the Duggar’s began their “Reality” Show Back in 2008, I could hardly stand to watch it. It definitely triggered me. It was too much like some of the families in GCx. Honestly, those families depressed me. Something was flat about them. They were too perfect. There was a lot of pretension in public, and apparently a lot of pressure in private. Reading the stories of children who suffered under unhealthy and even abusive control makes me so sad for them. It actually seemed sad back then just observing them in public.

Recently, I have come across some video clips about the Duggar Family. One clip was of Michelle Duggar receiving a “Mother of the Year” or some such award from Vision Forum. In the front row was old GCx member, Geoffrey Botkin, and his wife. Others were of Josh Duggar. But, the video “podcast” I saw today about Jim Bob’s unhealthy and insensitive control of his family gave confirmation to my earlier triggers. The way he seems to be abusively isolating the rest of his family from his daughter Jill by labeling her “dangerous” seemed eerily familiar. Jim Bob has blocked her from not only the family in his house, but even talking to her own mother. According to the Jill, this is because she has done her own investigating and is finding out things that were hidden and even deceptively disguised. According to the podcast people who know Jim Bob say he is all about his success and image even at, it seems, the cost of his own family.

I realize this appears like a bunch of gossip. Some may wonder why I should care about some “reality celebrities?” My answer is I was curious if something that really bothered me years ago had what I suspected behind it. Sometimes our gut knows more than our eyes or ears.



Link to: Jill Duggar Labeled “Dangerous,” Cut off by Jim Bob
https://youtu.be/LmY8gMp6Y8w



« Last Edit: February 22, 2022, 09:04:38 pm by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
Huldah
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« Reply #123 on: February 23, 2022, 01:01:30 pm »

Unlike you, Janet, I didn't initially pick up on the dysfunction back when I first watched the show. I thought they seemed like a wholesome, if unusual, family. The thing that opened my eyes was an episode where everyone was up on the platform at some kind of church, when one of the little boys fell through some kind of trap door in the flooring. Instead of rushing to help him, the whole family whipped out their phones to record him lying down there, scared and in pain. Presumably they did it to get footage for the show. I could no longer watch the show after that.

In my opinion the Duggar parents made an enormous mistake when they acted as if Josh's abuse of his sisters were "just" an act of illicit sex. Even putting aside the ages of the girls (just for the sake of argument), abusing a victim who is asleep and unaware of the abuse--and therefore unable to either object or consent--is a whole different category of evil. Biblically speaking, all sex outside of marriage is a sin, but sexually predatory behavior is not the same dynamic as consensual nonmarital sex. It's a profoundly serious issue that a few weeks of work camp (the Duggars' solution) can't fix. What a genuine tragedy it was for Josh, that his parents didn't seek expert professional help for him when he first told them about the problem.

But then, even on this forum, there have been posts that express the same underlying attitude. There have been posts here from people who judge sexual sin solely by how much physical contact was made, without regard for things like coercion, consent, or manipulation.
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« Reply #124 on: February 23, 2022, 10:01:25 pm »

How weird that they all went for their phone camera instead of rushing to help him. Talk about twisted priorities. That’s a wee bit like Jesus’ story of the animal falling into the pit on the Sabbath and the Pharisees leaving him there to suffer because it was a Sabbath day when they were not to work. It becomes of prime importance that one is presenting a “godly” image to “keep the law,” rather than the actual care of what God has entrusted you.

Kind of like the wife of someone with child-molesting tendencies & preoccupation with child pornography staying with him along with her young children because of appearances and “keeping the law” (not to separate or divorce) are more important than the actual children. They have lost connection to Jesus if they ever had it.


I pray some of these GCx parents realize their “image-building” and legalism came at the cost of their children’s hurt and suffering. I pray that they ask their adult children’s forgiveness and begin the process of healing.



« Last Edit: March 20, 2022, 07:12:41 pm by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
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« Reply #125 on: March 20, 2022, 08:38:13 pm »

There were more than a few verses that McCotter exploited to paint himself (or the church he founded) as the hero in the midst of great trouble. He threatened often the danger of a life distracted, wasted or regretted. Frequently, this was portrayed as those outside the church. Even the most dedicated Christians outside his GCx Churches were “missing the mark”, according to his teaching. He and other leaders regularly manipulated and frightened their people by threatening, “Good is the enemy of the best.” He continually defended at length his claim that only in his churches would we find the true and best biblical model for “New Testament Christianity.

Just a couple of the many verses he used to persuasively appear “biblical” in his methods were Psalm 81:16 and Proverbs 13:20.


But I would feed you with the finest of the wheat,
And with honey from the rock I would satisfy you.”

Psalm 81:16


He who walks with wise men will be wise,
But the companion of fools will suffer harm.

Proverbs 13:20


With each verse he implied or outrightly taught that his church was the finest of the wheat, and that he was the wise man. Teaching or Implying all other churches or Christian pursuits or leadings of the Holy Spirit were enemies of THE BEST, and even folly. This was “so” because McCotter and his leaders said it was so. And the severe discipline of God was upon anyone attempting to actually investigate those claims outside their walls, according to McCotter and GCx Leaders.

Looking back now upon these arrogant and farcical claims, with emotional and physical distance between us, it is much plainer to recognize that they were bogus. Quoting the authority of scripture in reference to a false claim does not make that claim true. Sadly, it appears to hide the lie. McCotter and his cohorts hid their continual wrongdoings behind scripture to defend their actions. But searching the scripture, observing their character, and getting biblical counsel outside their sources reveal the truth that in fact, the false claimers are often the true culprits.

In fact, they were the fools we suffered harm from, as we were constantly isolated in their company. They were far from the finest of wheat to our soul, actually more like straw.




« Last Edit: March 22, 2022, 04:45:38 pm by Janet Easson Martin » Logged

For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.        - Saint Augustine
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